iPhone Photography


Photos taken, and wholly manipulated within the confines of my iPhone. It presents an interesting photographic challenge, but in many ways it frees you as well- you're forced to work with what you have, and the results are often surprising, to say the least.

Brine That Duck, Render That Fat, And Do It Right

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Get Your Crisp On

More to the point, here's the first step to doing a duck breast right, the first time, and without all the nonsense of having to deal with overly fatty meat (as though there is such a thing- but still, crispy-juicy-fatty is fantastic, flabby fatty is generally NOT.)

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In this case, I made panseared duck breast with an outrageously yummy potato gratin on the side; the gratin is a post all its own and we're talking about duck here. My stepdad, Larry, is one of the most culinarily-adventurous souls I know, and one of my favorite people on the planet- he's well-traveled, and he's not afraid to subject his tastebuds to the occasional assault in the interests of experimentation. As we were killing time one day, the conversation turned to grub (as it often does) and I mentioned making a rotisserie duck once that was pretty fabulous. He peered at me over the magazine du jour and said "You know, I really don't care for duck." I recall being somewhat gobsmacked, here was a fellow culinary Expeditionary, confessing what I perceived to be a huge gap in his gustatory habits. After some conversational poking and prodding (consisting largely of me looking generally flabbergasted and puffing my cheeks like a landed fish and saying 'b-but-but why not?!?'— very suave, I think you'll agree), we narrowed it down- the duck he'd tried was too fatty. Now, by fatty, he wasn't saying "juicy, unctuous,  delicious goodness" but "ensconced in a massive layer of flab." So there we had it- his culinary world had been shriveled that little bit, not by poor product (as can often be the case) but rather by poor technique! Well, I can't stand for that, so here goes.

Brine Donald

Well, Donald here doesn't actually need it, and I want to point this out posthaste- a duck breast, salted and made crispy in its own fat, is the Avian kingdom's answer to bacon, and requires no culinary backflips to achieve. All the same, a little brine can set up your meal in a more long-term way- remember, we are striving for a balance in our meal, not only within the duck dish but across the entire meal. I'll be trying to get some savory into the mix; the bitter should be handled by the watercress, but we'll need to get our spicy/ salty in early, particularly since I'm hitting the duck with a Black Plum Sauce (for those of you in the SoCal area, there's a dried-foods store attached to Shun Fat Supermarket, off Beach in Westminster- you will be mobbed by about 6 cute little Vietnamese ladies plying you with samples of EVERYTHING they sell- green tea, cuttlefish jerky… but the dried fruits are magnificent. Buy them.)
  • 20-ish Tellicherry (Black) Peppercorns
  • 4 whole Cloves
Heat briefly in a small pan, until you smell the spices. Add:

  • ~1 tbsp Black Vinegar (yes, Black Vinegar- Worcestershire might work, but I didn't try it, so no promises)
  • ~2 tbsp Shaoxing cooking wine (some folks suggest dry sherry- again, I didn't try it and dunno. Get the Shaoxing.)
  • ~1 cup of water, to keep all the goodness from boiling off.
(Note: I use the "about" [~] thing quite a lot. I'm not a fan of hard-and-fast quantities, unless what we're doing is being baked- then I get persnickety)
Remove from heat, set aside.

I'm going to assume that you've already boned out your duck, or bought precut breasts (and if so, shame on you. Learn to butcher a bird! It's easy, cheap, and you get to make whatever creative cut you want. That's probably a whole other blog post though). Using a spectacularly sharp knife, make diagonal slashes through the skin and the fat, try not to cut into the breast muscle itself- move slowly and deliberately, don't try to be all Iron Chef about it. Make the slashes about 1/2" to 3/4" apart. Set the meat in your brining container. Add:
  • 1-2 tbsp Kosher salt
  • 2-3 tbsp of Palm sugar. (Yes, palm sugar. Brown sugar plus a little molasses might work, but… well, y'know.)
  • The peppercorn/ clove brine from above
  • Just enough water to cover.
Seal this up for at least 2 hours, 4 is better- 8 or more will probably be overkill.

Make it Sizzle

Time to render that magnificent duck fat. Conventional wisdom tells you to stick that duck in a hot pan, skin side down, and all the fat will come running out of it like Lindsay Lohan out of community service- but they'd be wrong. What you'll actually get is burned duck, with a thick layer of flabby fat, and rare-ish meat. Sound appetizing? It really, really isn't. Here's what you're going to do: Start with a cold non-stick skillet. Lay the duck in, skin side down. Set the heat to medium-low. Set your timer for 5 minutes, and go do stuff. Write a blog or whatever- when the timer goes off, check it- if you see more than 1/8" of fat in the bottom of the pan, pour the fat off and SAVE it. 

Set the timer for 5 more minutes; repeat. This whole procedure will take probably 30-45 minutes, at the end you should have a beautiful, relatively thin layer of fat; golden and crispy and dying to be eaten. Crank the heat to medium-high, flip the duck, give it 3 minutes. Get Donald off the heat, out of the pan, and onto a plate pronto- you'll have beautiful, salty-sweet, crispy-skinned duck, done perfectly to medium. If you want more well-done, give him 4 minutes at the last flip over medium-high, and tent with foil for a few minutes before serving. Always serve skin-side-up, topped with the sauce of your choice- Fig, balsamic, black cherry, black plum… any sweet-tart combo will do! Hope you enjoy.

 

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Surf-n-Turf Maki Rolls

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Well, I promised that I would document a pretty interesting idea I had. Since I'm not a regular food blogger, I'm probably going to be a poor teacher. Generally, there are some things in the recipe that I won't regale you with, as I expect you should have a few basics worked out (how to sear meat, make sushi rice, and the like) so please forgive me if I pass right over something you needed to know; you can ask me for any details in the comments section.

What're we making again? Langostino Maki with Beef Tataki?

Essentially, we're making a basic maki roll (what many, albeit incorrectly, refer to as a 'sushi roll') with Langostinos inside and beef tataki on top. Ultimately, we need to make a handful of things so let's step to it:

  • Wasabi/ Miso/ Cilantro mayonnaise
  • Langostino Filling
  • Corno Di Toro Peppers, quick-pickled
  • Japanese cucumbers, cut into matchsticks
  • A 2-inch thick Filet Mignon/ tenderloin, marinated in Ginger/ Garlic/ Soy dressing.
  • Sushi Rice and the like.

 

The Crap You Should Have Done Yesterday, But Didn't

First, let's talk about everything you should have done yesterday: Namely, Corno DiToro quick pickle, and beef marinade.

Quick-pickled Corno Di Toro Chilies

Corno Di Toro Chiles are a lot like Fresno Chiles, but somewhat meatier and sweeter (ergo why I chose them) but Fresnos, or even red-ripe Jalapeños would work equally well for this. This is painfully simple:

Seed and Julienne:

  • 4 Corno Di Toro Chilies (or probably 6-8 fresno Chilies; yes, there will be leftovers, no, I don't have a smaller 1-shot recipe unless you intend to use a thimble for a picklejar)
  • 3 cloves garlic, finely minced

In a saucepan, toast:

  • 1 tsp cumin seed
  • 1 tsp coriander seed
  • 2 cloves 
  • 1 tsp dark mustard seed
  • 1 bay leaf

Toast until fragrant. Add:

  • 1/2 cup cider or rice vinegar (I used Rice vinegar, but Cider would work equally well) Bring to a boil.

Fill your little 2-pint mason jar with the chilies. Pour the vinegar mixture in, along with a *small* pinch of salt. Slap the lid on, tighten, and ignore it for at least an hour or 2; overnight is MUCH better.

 

Marinade for the Tenderloin

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This is a suribachi- think "Japanese Mortar and Pestle" and you'd be about half-right; it's actually more like a food grinder. Technique is up to the chef here, but in general one of these is handy. However, I'm aware that most of you probably don't have a suribachi, so you can use graters, the small prep bowl of a food processor, or whatever- the net result is likely the same, flavor-wise; I just like the suribachi because I can grind the ingredients to an even paste. You'll need, at the end of this all, the following ingredients:

  • 1/4 cup of grated/ very well-smashed ginger
  • 2-3 tbsp (or more, if you're like me) grated/ smashed garlic
  • 1 tsp sesame seeds
  • 1 tsp shoyu (soy) sauce
  • 1 tbsp honey (I prefer raw honey for the flavor, but any will do)
  • 1 scallion, sliced thin

Stir to combine, pour over steak (I prefer little plastic bags for this part) and drop it in the chill chest for a few hours, overnight is better.

 

Wasabi/ Cilantro/ Miso Mayo

Starting with the easy stuff, here's the rundown on the mayo: 

  • 1 Cup Best Foods (or homemade...) mayonnaise
  • 1 tbsp Wasabi Powder
  • 1 +1/2 tbsp Red Miso paste (no, there are no substitutions- must be miso paste. If you have powdered miso, go outside and curse at yourself for a few hours, until you feel like punching yourself in the face. Then, you'll know how I feel when I hear the phrase "powdered miso".)

Put it all in a ramekin and mix it up well with a whisk/ fork. divide into half. Now, in a mini-food-prep, add:

  • 1/2 cup cilantro (coriander Leaves for you limey-types)
  • 1 tsp sesame oil

Pulse with the mayonnaise to blend thoroughly, put it in a squeeze bottle and set aside. (By "set aside" I mean "in the refrigerator." I think you ought to know basic food safety rules, so I'm not going to belabor them here.)

Langostinos, Baby.

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Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? What's a Langostino? Well, it's mostly semantics, as you'll see, but here's the basics: A Langostino (from the Español Langosta, Lobster) is a subspecies of crustacean that is neither Lobster nor Prawn; its common name (Squat Lobster) sums it up. Bottom Line: Tastes like lobster, small and very sweet like prawns. It's a win-win, they're inexpensive ($20 for 3 lbs at Costco) and you will NOT need them all for this recipe. Good thing they're generally prefrozen.

Directions: add

  • 1 cup (~8 oz) chopped Langostino tails
  • 1/2 cup of our Mayo-sabi-so (above)
  • 1/2 Fresno Chile, seeded and finely diced

Chop the langostinos coarsely; mix other ingredients together (start sparingly with the Mayosabiso! We aren't making soup, here, just enough mayo to hold it together.) Get it in your prep bowl, cover and get it into the frigde. Food Safety, see?!?

Slicin' and a'Dicin' and a' Choppin' that Meat, or Beef Fallout

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Sear your Filet- in my case, with a filet weighing ~10 oz., that's about a minute on all sides in a wicked-hot skillet, followed by 5 minutes in a 350-degree oven. Sear nicely, drop it back into the marinade, cover and send everyone back to the fridge while you work on other stuff. If you're already to this stage, then I'd start the rice right after you pop this in the fridge.

Rollin' That Maki

You're going to be doing a reverse-roll here; that is to say, you're going to be making the maki roll rice-side-down. In the interest of brevity, and because books could (and have been) written about maki rolling, I'll leave you on your own for this part- but here's the basics: Distribute your sushi rice evenly over the nori (seaweed), and flip it over so it's rice-side down on a sushi-rolling mat that you've previously wrapped in plastic wrap.

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At this point, you'll need the following things on hand and ready to go. In case you missed that, I repeat (a la Bourdain) get your mise en place together, my friend!

  • Goat Cheese (I rolled mine in plastic to make it tube-shaped, you can do whatever- just keep it small)
  • Avocado, sliced
  • Langostino Mayomisabi (yes, that's a made-up word)
  • Matchstick cucumbers
  • Quick-pickled chilies

Lay them out as above, I'd advise at least twice as many chilies as shown in the picture.

Slice and Dice That Steak

A picture (series) is worth a thousand words.

Serve it.

Slice, apply to the top of your maki roll, and slice the maki roll into bite-sized pieces. Serve, garnished with more of the garlic Mayowasabiso.

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Cincinnati Chili at the Dairy Bar

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Cincinnati Chili at the Dairy Bar in Whitley City, Kentucky. For those that live nearby but haven't been, it's proper 50's Diner fare.

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Lazy Saturday, Lazy Dogs

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6 months ago, my wife and I adopted 2 starving dogs, both of them Golden Retrievers (or some mix, but the resemblance to Retrievers is pretty undeniable.) They both weighed about 35 pounds when we found them; now (following a pretty steady diet of puppy kibble and peanut-butter treats) they are both at a very good weight (55 & 65 pounds, respectively) and leading a very fulfilling life of complete leisure punctuated by playing fetch and swimming in kiddy pools.

I've added a pic of Pumpkin from before their rehab, as well as some from today.

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Nutmeg did grin.

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Taken at Home

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Pizza at The Pub

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Taken at The Pub, Burnside KY

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Half a tree

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Taken at Sloans Valley, Kentucky

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Simply for amusement

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Here are a collection of photos I have taken/ modified using an iPhone app called "Half Tone." What use are pictures if they don't amuse you from time to time?

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